No More Questions: Gerard Butler from ‘Gods of Egypt’

gerard butler interview

Welcome to No More Questions, where I ask the actors you know and love everything you want to know and love…

This week, let’s give a big round of Internet applause to sometimes-celebrated actor, Gerard Butler!

*Note: No More Questions is satire. It does not reflect the actual views of Gerard Butler, Jon Negroni, or anyone else mentioned in this interview. Some of the content in this interview comes from actual quotes by Gerard Butler in 2016. Seriously. 

JN: Can I call you Gerry? 

GB: No.

JN: Gerry, your new film, Gods of Egypt, premieres this Friday — or Thursday depending on how optimistic you are about people seeing it. Are you happy you made this movie? 

GB: Yeah.

JN: Really? There’s been some controversy…

GB: Well, I just want to point out—

JN: —surrounding your surfing incident in 2012.

GB: Oh, that. Well, I’m clean now, so…

JN: And we’re all happy about that. Do you think it affected the quality of Chasing Mavericks overall?

GB: You…you saw Chasing Mavericks?

JN: Next question. People are saying that it’s odd for you to be playing an Egyptian God thing considering your non-Egyptian likeness. 

GB: Well, Gods of Egypt is mythology. Not historical fiction.

JN: Please, Gerry, we all know what this is about. How long has this feud between you and Joel Edgerton been going on?

GB: I just don’t understand why he gets a pass for playing Ramses. He’s Australian, which is way farther from Egypt than Scotland.

JN: Well, he did also make The Gift, so I think we like him again. What would you say was your biggest accomplishment of 2015? Besides the DVD sales of How to Train Your Dragon 2.

GB: I spent most of 2015 filming a few new movies that are coming out this year.

JN: That’s right. London is Falling Down comes out next month. 

GB: No, it’s London Has Fallen.

JN: How did you react when Brenda Song from The Suite Life of Zack and Cody was cast as your love interest? 

GB: Confused, but they changed it so…

JN: Do you blame yourself for Gamer

GB: No, I blame Ludacris. Can I talk about Gods of Egypt now?

JN: Is that what you really want. 

GB: You just phrased that question like a statement.

JN: This. Is. A question. 

GB: Gods of Egypt is about characters, you know? And this amazing journey they go on together. One’s a mortal and one’s an immortal—

JN: That’s great and no one cares, but just let me know right now, Gerry. Sequel plans for Phantom of the Opera

GB: …they learn what life is about and what they can learn from each other. And since you brought it up, it’s akin to the relationship between the Phantom and Christine.

JN: You’re Christine in this case? 

GB: No, that would be Nikolaj Coster-Waldau.

JN: Eh? 

GB: Sorry, the Game of Thrones guy. Anyway, it’s fun to be the villain in Gods of Egypt. I get to be such a  badass again.

JN: He reminds me of your character from The Ugly Truth. Wow, how many movies have you done, Gerry? 

GB: Just call me Mr. Butler. And I stopped keeping count in 2006.

JN: Would you say that your character in Gods of Egypt is a personified weapon?

GB: Yes! Exactly, that’s exactly right!

JN: Ha, well then I just won a bet. Hey Adonis, get over here. 

AG: What’s up.

JN: I was right the other day when I said Gerard Butler thinks of his character in Gods of Egypt as a weapon personified.

AG: Is that him over there?

JN: Yeah.

AG: Why does he look so angry?

JN: We were just talking about…

AG: …The Ugly Truth?

(laugh in agreement)

GB: Can I talk about my character, Set, again?

JN: Wait, his name is “Set?”

GB: Yeah, he’s the god of darkness.

JN: And film studio sets? 

AG: No, Jon. He’s clearly the god of volleyball.

JN: Then he would be the god of matches, DONIS. 

GB: He’s the god of darkness!

JN: Seth is? 

GB: No, it’s Set.

JN: But Seth. 

GB: Fine, his name is Seth. Now, his best aspect is how—

JN: This is a real character? Seth, I mean. 

GB: Yes, based on real Egyptian mythology.

AG: That’s offensive to Egyptians.

GB: What, the fact that this movie set in Africa stars two white guys?

AG: No, calling him Seth.

GB: Fine, whatever. Set or “Seth” is the god of storms, the desert, and overall disorder.

JN: Earlier, you said darkness. 

GB: It’s an array of things.

JN: (whispers to Adonis) more like the god of confusion. 

GB: Anyway, Set is just a bad dude and longtime rival of Horus, god of the sky.

JN: He’s the bad guy in the movie? 

GB: No, I am.

JN: Aw, but you’re so sweet. 

GB: (coughs) Well, uh, thank you. Horus is represented by a falcon, and they nail that aesthetic with…with uh…

JN: Game of Thrones guy? 

GB: Yes, thank you.

JN: Is there any…(laughs)…room for romance between your characters? 

GB: What? No! Set—

JN: —Seth

GB: Seth is a dangerous and powerful ruler! He doesn’t love anyone!

JN: (leans over to Adonis) Formulaic. 

AG: I know right.

GB: What makes him unique is the sadness I bring to the character, because he’s very tragic.

JN: So Law Abiding Citizen meets 300

GB: Well…um…I guess.

AG: I’d see that.

JN: Mr. Butler, thank you so much for coming on No More Questions. Can’t wait to have you back for London is Falling Around.

GB: I can.


Gods of Egypt is set to release worldwide on February 26, 2016.

I’m Jon and thanks for reading this. You can subscribe to my posts by clicking “Follow” in the right sidebar. Or just say hey on Twitter! @JonNegroni

Review: ‘The Witch’ is an Unsettling Folk Tale Worth Talking About

the witch review

The Witch forces those who watch it to think deeply about what it all means. And many people will bicker over which conclusion they think their fellow moviegoers should arrive at after seeing it.

Luckily, my favorite thing about The Witch is how exciting it is to talk about it, and there’s much to discuss. Set many years before the infamous Salem Witch Trials, The Witch takes place in 1600s New England, as a budding family is banished from their Puritan plantation and forced to build a farm in the wilderness from the ground up (literally).

These devout Christians, led by patriarch William (Ralph Ineson), are strictly religious with their five children, especially when one goes missing early on. Haunted by a “witch of the wood,” and perhaps each other, the dysfunctional family experiences a haunting unlike most offerings you’d expect from the horror genre.

For one thing, there’s little left to the imagination when it comes to the film’s own paranormal threats, and it crosses disturbing territory that will be hard to watch for some casual horror fans. But they’ll certainly delight in the artistically frightening ambience of the crisp pilgrim farm, a ghastly soundtrack on par with It Follows, and beautiful scenery.

the witch review

What’s more interesting, however, is the film’s message, as well as all of the unique takeaways that will come from moviegoers of differing ideologies. Satanists have already praised this movie for coming across as “pro-witchcraft” due to the way the film ends, while theologists simultaneously praise the film for addressing the true dangers of said witchcraft.

For newcomer writer and director, Robert Eggers, that’s quite the achievement, as he claims in the credits to have based much of the dialogue and story on a collection of true events. And he manages to also bring out revelatory performances out of his child actors, of whom I’ll single out Anya Taylor-Joy and Harvey Scrimshaw.

Is it a cautionary tale about the demonic forces hidden from our sight? Or is it instead criticizing religious overreach, and how it can be the origin of the very darkness they fear? Some will argue it’s a little of both, and balance is truly the virtue we can derive from The Witch. I doubt there needs to be a right answer.

The Witch gets a B

It’s a good horror film with great performances and pleasant scenery. Its scariest moments will bring on disturbing nightmares and provoke the right kinds of conversations, but The Witch suffers a bit from an over-indulgence of shock value that will alienate more people than it will engage.

A lot of people will like this movie, especially hardcore horror fans. But if you don’t care much for scary movies or even this subject material (akin to Arthur Miller’s The Crucible), then The Witch probably won’t change your mind.

 

Snarcasm: Disney is Eating Pixar’s Lunch

disney pixar

Snark + Sarcasm = what you’re about to read.

This week’s Snarcasm will be a tad different and (dare I say it) a little more serious than usual. Rather than take down one of the worst articles on the Internet (which have been nothing but fan theories lately), I’m addressing some fear, uncertainty, and doubt crisscrossing the world of animation.

And it really needs to stop.

See, I’m all for criticizing Pixar when they deserve it (see Cars 2 and the third act of Brave). They’re not perfect, and we can all agree that mistakes were made in how they executed their latest feature, The Good Dinosaur.

But the groupthink has been reaching a bizarre consensus lately that ignores the triumph of Inside Out and yes, the underrated value offered by The Good Dinosaur. It seems that some people want  Pixar to be taken down a notch in the public eye because Disney Animation has been killing it lately with computer animated hits like TangledFrozen, and Big Hero 6.

disney pixar

Is that fair? Let’s dig in.

Germain Lussier at io9 writes:

Walt Disney Animation is Officially as Good as Pixar Now

Look, I know that the tagline for io9 is “Welcome to the Future,” but that doesn’t mean we can just skip ahead to a time period that doesn’t exist.

And I know that the last few movies made by Disney’s own animation studio have been big hits, but has anyone actually considered Big Hero 6 or Frozen to be better than Inside Out? Let’s read what Lussier has to say.

For several years, Pixar’s animated films made Pixar’s parent company, Disney, look good. And meanwhile, Disney’s own in-house animation studio was going through a rough patch—the company wasn’t making the kind of films people expected from Walt Disney’s namesake.

Lussier goes on to explain how most people don’t even realize that Pixar and Disney are separate entities. But a key thing he points out is that Pixar has long made their own movies outside of Disney’s control (even after Disney bought them).

just as Disney was releasing all those Pixar hits, Disney Animation—a branch of the company with one of the most amazing resumes in film history—was still releasing its own films. Films that usually, and unfortunately, were much less memorable.

These movies include decent but forgettable flicks, such as Meet the RobinsonsBoltThe Princess and the Frog, and other “nice tries.”

disney pixar

It took lots of time, effort, blood, sweat and tears—but with films like Frozen, Big Hero 6 and next month’s new film Zootopia, Walt Disney Animation Studios has finally done the impossible: It’s regained its former glory and can easily share the animation throne with Pixar.

First off, Zootopia hasn’t even come out yet. Lussier caught a screening and gave it high praise later in this article, but we have to just assume that his opinion will match everyone else’s. We’ll revisit this later.

But fine, let’s “welcome the future” and assume that Zootopia will be as good as the trailers make it look. Are FrozenBig Hero 6, and Zootopia enough to take this “animation throne?” And “easily” as he claims?

Lussier is at least half correct from a box office standpoint. Obviously, Frozen made tons of money well out of the reach of Pixar movies. But I hesitate to consider cold, hard cash other people have earned to be a reason for liking a movie.

And to be honest, I don’t even want to compare these movies because they’re so incredibly different. For one thing, Pixar movies are original, unique concept movies that make you fall in love with seemingly mundane yet lovable characters. Disney works to be more accessible with glossy characters and environments that are beautiful from the onset because they’re often derived from pre-existing stories. As a result they usually feel more like pretty art instead of affecting art.

I’m here to tell you things are just getting better. Last week, I was lucky enough to catch an early screening of Disney Animation’s latest film, Zootopia.It’s the best film Disney Animation has made in 20 years.

Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely hope that Lussier is right about this because that’s great news for everyone. But watch what happens next.

Not only is it a film worthy of Pixar, it’s light years ahead of Pixar’s most recent movie, The Good Dinosaur.

Frequent readers know that I completely, absolutely disagree, considering The Good Dinosaur was my second favorite film of 2015 and one of the few films I gave an A+ last year. And while plenty of people agree with Lussier’s sentiment, many also find The Good Dinosaur to be an underrated gem like I do.

disney pixar

And then he says this about Zootopia:

Now, is it as good as Pixar at its best? Inside Out or Toy Story good? No, probably not.

Wait, let me get this straight. Disney Animation’s best film in 20 years isn’t as good as one of Pixar’s most recent movies?

Do you see why I chose this article for Snarcasm? It’s obviously well written, and Lussier is a very smart person. But for whatever reason, people are making grand conclusions about the quality of Pixar based on very slim arguments. If the best Disney animation movie isn’t even better than Inside Out, then how can you even argue that the studio itself is “just as good?”

Lussier seems to be basing his argument on the fact that he thinks The Good Dinosaur sucks, but that’s just one movie. And he’s also saying that the pinnacle of Disney isn’t as good as the best of the Pixar movies. So why say they are easily just as good?

I guess it frustrates me because Inside Out proved so well that Pixar hasn’t slipped the way so many people claimed they would over the last few years. And now we’re already hearing the narrative that Disney Animation is getting better while they’re getting worse, and it’s just bonkers.

And yet even with all that, there are other factors in play here too. Disney Animation and Pixar now create films in the same way, and share creative resources, so the two balancing out makes sense.

Pixar movies and Disney Animation movies aren’t even remotely similar. Can you honestly say that Frozen and Tangled are legitimately made like Pixar movies? These are fairy tales that are built up on source material. Wreck-It Ralph comes closer, but it also relies on a huge list of existing entities to make its video game world come to life. And Big Hero 6 is based on a Marvel Comic of all things.

disney pixar

Well, loosely.

Meanwhile, Pixar creates entire worlds. They make you feel for rats, monsters, and even the very idea of emotions. Their creativity is absolutely unmatched when they’re at their best. Even The Good Dinosaur pushes animation itself in ways Disney has barely touched (aside from Big Hero 6) with effects shots and photorealistic landscapes that actually contribute to the narrative.

They may be in the same sport, but Disney and Pixar are in two very different ballparks.

Plus Pixar’s films were so successful in the past, Pixar’s begun to make more and more sequels (Monsters University recently, plus Finding Dory, Cars 3, Toy Story 4 and Incredibles 2 coming soon)

Just keep in mind that Pixar has only made one lackluster sequel. We still don’t know if they can pull off another Toy Story 2, but I’d bet money that Incredibles and Finding Nemo are worthy of the challenge. Lussier sort of points this out as well and even makes the case that Disney is also making sequels for its popular movies with Frozen 2.

But none of that changes this basic fact: From a time when Pixar was ruling everything and Disney Animation Studios was making Treasure Planet and Home on the Range, things have once again aligned. Disney has not only gotten back to the high bar of quality set by Pixar, but that of its namesake, too.

I agree that Disney is back on track when it comes to recapturing its former glory, and Pixar’s own John Lasseter is a key reason why this is happening (Lussier also points this out). But the idea that Disney is somehow on the same level because they’ve made a few good movies in a row is a gut reaction, not a careful analysis. Pixar consistently makes superb, excellent movies, while Disney Animation makes good, sometimes great movies.

disney pixar

And if you don’t agree, then just try to tell me which current Disney movie even comes close to matching Toy StoryIncredibles, Finding NemoUp, and now Inside Out. Because not even Lussier could seem to do that.

One of these days I need to put together a full analysis on The Good Dinosaur and why I consider it to be vastly better than it gets credit for. While I’m not worried about Pixar’s foreseeable future because of the box office failure of that movie, it hurts to know that a movie with so much effort put into it is being considered worse than movies that are, at their core, deceptively generic.

At any rate, I’ll be seeing Zootopia for myself at a screening next week, and despite everything we just talked about, I couldn’t be more excited. Isn’t it great to know that both Disney and Pixar are putting their best efforts into animation right now?

Hey! If you’ve come across a silly article that deserves the Snarcasm treatment, send it my way via Twitter or the comments below!

I’m Jon and thanks for reading this. You can subscribe to my posts by clicking “Follow” in the right sidebar. Or just say hey on Twitter! @JonNegroni

 

Which is Better? ‘The Avengers’ vs ‘The Avengers: Age of Ultron’

avengers vs age of ultron

Which is Better is a monthly editorial series where I dare to compare the best and worst of everything. This month: Is the first Avengers movie better than its 2015 sequel, or is it the other way around? 

Last year, my friends and I debated this for an episode of my podcast, Now Conspiring. But to be honest, the debate didn’t go anywhere because we all sort of agreed (for once). Now that enough time has passed to let the movie sink in properly, I’ve decided to revisit these two movies and decide for myself.

Granted, a lot of fans of both movies have been debating this since last spring, pointing out every flaw in each movie that could somehow tip their arguments. But it’s unclear whether or not the somewhat lukewarm reception to Age of Ultron was a result of superhero movie fatigue, Marvel fatigue, or something else that may not be a reflection of the movie’s true quality.

If we’re judging by box office, it’s even murkier. At first glance, it may seem that Avengers is better than its sequel because it pulled in $100 million more at the box office, which is a drop in the bucket compared to both movies making roughly $1.5 billion each.

avengers vs age of ultron

But aren’t sequels supposed to be bigger hits than the originals? You’d think that, but it’s actually more common to see diminishing returns depending on the franchise.

Sticking to Marvel superheroes, not a single Spider-Man movie has made as much money domestically as the first one, despite Spider-Man 2 being considered a huge improvement and one of the greatest superhero movies of all time.

Most regard Empire Strikes Back to be the best of the Star Wars films, yet it made $200 million less than A New Hope, not even adjusting for inflation. Let’s not even get started on Return of a Jedi actually failing to net a profit.

So the argument has to come down to the movies themselves, metrics aside. For this week’s Which is Better, I’ll break both movies down on a series of points crucial to what makes a superhero movie great.

Starting with,

BEST STORY

avengers vs age of ultron

Few will argue that The Avengers and Avengers: Age of Ultron (AOU) are wildly different when it comes to plot execution. And for good reason.

Much of the beginning of Avengers centered around exposition that united all of our “mightiest heroes.” It was incredibly entertaining, of course, considering how new it felt to see these characters side by side in one movie.

But the plot was otherwise quite basic: The threat is established, the heroes are brought together to address it, a central action set piece gives them a reason to work together, and they save the day in one final battle. Pretty simple.

AOU had a lot more freedom to be complicated since a lot of that character-building exposition was done in the last film, and also because Avengers was such a monumental hit that the studio was confident people would remember what was going on in their cinematic universe.

So with AOU, we got three villains (sort of), tons of new side characters, and another world domination plot. And that was including many of the new characters introduced in the “Phase 2” of Marvel movies, Guardians of the Galaxy notwithstanding.

In AOU, Tony Stark’s creation was the established threat, but unlike Loki (who was also tied to a main character in a close way), Ultron was a complete unknown to the audience. He arrived on the scene quickly and drove the plot as soon as he showed up.

avengers vs age of ultron

The heroes were already together by this point, so the movie spent more time developing them as they worked to deal with the threat of Ultron. If we’re judging both movies by complexity and character arcs, than AOU surpasses the original in spades.

And that’s because the first Avengers is essentially a party, or a celebration of the fact that Marvel pulled off one of the greatest team-ups in cinematic history. But aside from some quips and other quick dialogue, the characters didn’t progress much from beginning to end. They just decided (again) to do what they’ve already done in their own respective movies: be heroes.

“Saving the day” wasn’t such a black and white solution in AOU, which I found very refreshing. Each Avenger had an agenda, and some sparks of disagreement and strife popped up between these characters, teasing the upcoming Civil War.

This worked because getting invested in characters is what made AOU feel more like a complete story compared to the first Avengers, which was more of a continuation of a running story that didn’t feel all that resolved by the end.

To be fair, AOU having a more complex plot also brought on a ton of narrative issues, many of them being the cause of Joss Whedon having to set up future movies with throwaway scenes that didn’t feel as cohesive. A good example is Thor’s mini-vacation to awaken his new powers, a side adventure that was given hardly any time to be built up or explained well. As I mentioned earlier, Ultron was also rushed as a villain, probably to give more time to the Wakanda references they had to include to set up Black Panther.

So AOU isn’t perfect, but I’d say the good certainly outweighs the bad. The darker tone wasn’t quite as dark as people hoped for, but there was a new sense of tension that actually got a payoff in the end with one of the first key deaths in these movies. And a lot of what doesn’t work that well in AOU is sort of indicative of the same problems existing in the original. We just didn’t harp on them as much back in 2012 because the novelty of the film was so, well, novel.

Both movies have great, enjoyable narratives, but I have to give this point to AOU for being bolder and containing a more dense story, flaws aside.

BEST CHARACTERS

avengers vs age of ultron

I’ll do this one fast. It’s a tie.

As I mentioned earlier, AOU was fantastic at giving us more insight into these characters, which gives it a huge advantage in this debate. Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver are notable exceptions that I give a pass due to the messiness surrounding the rights for those characters.

That said, Avengers pulled off something equally impressive by reintroducing the core team without spoon-feeding us tons of information about them we didn’t need to know. Marvel could have easily decided to treat us like we’re stupid and need a “Previously on” in order to remember who Thor and Captain America are.

To put it simply, both movies do a terrific job at showcasing great characters. The story elements behind these characters are certainly stronger in AOU, but we’ve already evaluated that in the previous section, so it’s a tie.

BEST VILLAIN

avengers vs age of ultron

Loki or Ultron? Oh, who am I kidding…

Everyone (I think) loves Loki. It’s been a running joke for some time that he’s pretty much the only “good” Marvel villain. And for the most part, I actually agree.

He was an effortless scene stealer, in no small part thanks to Tom Hiddleston’s wonderful take on the character. He captured the comic-book villain quite well, while also updating it perfectly for feature films. He was funny, arrogant, and even a little sympathetic. But despite this, he was incredibly threatening, despite not having any “raw” power.

We knew throughout Avengers that Loki wasn’t that strong of a guy. Yet he commanded a ton of presence and was taken incredibly seriously. Using him for the first movie was a perfect choice because he was the perfect villain to contrast the raw power of the Avengers, who were vastly more intimidating when it came to brute strength.

Yet he wasn’t even “smarter” compared to Tony Stark and Bruce Banner. There was just an unspoken mental advantage he was able to hold over the heroes just enough to provoke them into finally stopping him.

Ultron was an attempt to up the ante with a villain who could be strong enough to bring down the Avengers, but they went with giving him an advantage aside from brute strength again.  Not being that powerful himself, Ultron commanded a huge army and could tamper with their technology, even the Internet.

A problem that arose with this was when Scarlet Witch introduced yet another alternative to brute strength with her mind powers. But by the end of AOU, the Avengers do what they always need to do: save the day with their muscles…and lasers and hammers and what not.

An unstoppable villain that could have defeated all of the Avengers with brute strength would have strangely been more refreshing and a unique challenge for our heroes. It’s actually a bit ironic because I’m sure being different was what the writers intended to do. And while Ultron himself was sarcastic and entertaining, I found myself feeling almost nothing when he was discarded.

Best villain goes to The Avengers.

BEST ACTION

avengers vs age of ultron

I’m actually cheating a bit by saying “best action,” because I’m really talking about how these movies work overall as action films. So I’m judging how beautiful they are, set pieces, how the special effects aid the experience, and of course, fight choreography.

That criteria in mind, this is a pretty easy decision. While both films are extremely polished, AOU is the one that stands out when it comes to those moments that define a great action movie.

Like I mentioned earlier, AOU is just more dense. Avengers has three major action scenes, and all of them are incredibly one-note and completely one-upped by the sequel.

For example:

The Avengers starts with a series of minor confrontations between the Avengers themselves. This is done even better in AOU when they’re fighting Tony Stark’s suits after the party, as it’s a surprising action scene that gets the plot started on the right tone.

The second act of Avengers features Hulk on a rampage. AOU one-ups this in a huge way by unleashing Hulk on innocent people, forcing Tony Stark to don the built-up Hulkbuster armor and finally prove a worthy challenge to the overpowered character. This is, in my opinion, the best action scene in the MCU for a laundry list of reasons.

Finally, the original ends with a massive battle where the heroes are vastly outnumbered. And in the end, someone nearly dies. AOU one-ups this by actually killing off a character (albeit not someone as key to the franchise as Tony Stark).

Aside from all that, there’s just a lot more going on in AOU when it comes to the action. I don’t think it’s necessarily prettier, but I’d be hard pressed to find anything about the original that trumps it in this category.

Point goes to Avengers: Age of Ultron.

THE VERDICT

avengers vs age of ultron

Well, it looks like my answer is the same as it was a year ago. I consider Avengers: Age of Ultron to be better than The Avengers. It has a better plot, it maintains what we love about the characters in the original, and it has a more expansive, thrilling set of action scenes.

It wasn’t a landslide, obviously, and to be completely honest, The Avengers is still my favorite out of the two. The experience I had watching it was unlike any other I’ve had in the theater, and it’s filled to the brim with quotes and moments I’ll get nostalgic over for years to come. But I can’t say that I think it’s a better film, overall, even if it has just the right amount of Loki.

Agree? Disagree? Let’s talk about it in the comments. And let me know what you’d like to see compared in the next Which is Better. 

Thanks for reading this! You can subscribe to my posts by clicking “Follow” in the right sidebar. Or just say hey on Twitter: @JonNegroni

Review: ‘Hail, Caesar!’ Is a Divine Comedy

Hail Caesar review

Making movies about making movies is a risky gambit. But directors/writers Joel and Ethan Coen are up to the challenge in Hail, Caesar!, a near-parody of 50s Hollywood complete with Josh Brolin as “fixer” Eddie Mannix.

Mannix is the “Physical Producer” at Capitol Pictures (not Records), and his job is to keep the wheels from squeaking within a morally bored Hollywood studio lot rife with kidea-pings, illegitimate pregnancies, and other scandals that could ruin Capitol’s celebrities and incoming cash flow.

But Hail, Caesar! is not as straightforward at first glance, or even viewing, with its narrative or characters. True, the film covers a 28-hour day within the life of Mannix and his celebrities, but it weaves itself through a remarkably engrossing dance number here, a hilarious artistic drama over there, and then wildly entertaining conversations elsewhere in Malibu among…well, I won’t spoil it.

Further, Caesar is quite literally a divine comedy, in that it provides a light message in what can only be perceived as anti-religion (in the organized sense) and pro-faith. An odd, yet unsurprising choice for the Coens, who have a penchant for relying on straight, middle-America characters to draw audience sympathy. Yet like Big Lebowski, it’s the small details that trump the more subtle ones that will fight to distract you from what the Coens are trying to pull off.

Hail Caesar review

The film will make you feel smart for catching his den references to a literal spaghetti western or the name of a popular communist on a business card. Then you’ll fall to the charm of how it frames its religious ideology, which strikes first as a “Don’t be a Jerk” message until you stop and take the final scene in Hail, Caesar! (the movie within the movie, not the one directed by the Coens) more literally when one word forgotten by the star actor (George Clooney) happens to be faith.

For that and many other reasons, Hail, Caesar! is the first truly great wide release of 2016, in that it provides a thoroughly entertaining narrative just begging to be discoursed, rehashed, and argued among lovers of all films, not just work by the Coen brothers.

I’m going to give Hail, Caesar! an A-

To be fair, I don’t think Hail, Caesar! will sat isn’t all moviegoers (which is not a fault of the movie). Cinephiles will have the most fun with it, and I suspect it will leave a lasting impact on those who have the patience to breathe in the style, the substance, and most definitely the details.

I’m Jon and thanks for reading this. You can subscribe to my posts by clicking “Follow” in the right sidebar. Or just say hey on Twitter! @JonNegroni

Review: ‘Dirty Grandpa’ Is a Meaningless Excursion

dirty grandpa review

It’s clear that director Dan Mazer has essentially given up on breaking new ground with his comedies, of which he’s normally been a cowriter. I Give it a Year and Borat were the two relevates that, despite their flaws, gave mass audiences a reason to laugh at its seasoned actors.

I had hoped that Dirty Grandpa would do the same trick with Robert De Niro and Zac Efron, two genuinely funny actors that seem perfect for each other. But aside from a pair of somewhat amusing gags, Dirty Grandpa is sadly a raunchy disaster on par with Bruno and The Dictator.

Dick (played by De Niro) pressures his uptight grandson, Jason (Efron) into driving him to Florida after his wife’s funeral. Feeling free from the burdens of his marriage, Dick acts out in every sick way possible to make up for lost time, hoping that Jason loosens up as his wedding approaches.

As you can imagine, everyone in Jason’s life  back home (including his cartoonishly evil and neurotic fiancé played by Julianne Hough) is a bizarre caricature of modern white culture. Dick serves to be his foil, featuring a loud and obnoxious De Niro who says whatever he wants, which is supposed to be funny for some reason.

While this type of brainless comedy is watchable for some potty-humor audiences, it’s painful for attentive eyes looking for a coherent meaning. Throughout, the movie scolds white people, black people, gay people, and everyone else, in order to send the message that all people are repellant in one way or another. We just have to thoroughly insult and demean each other to feel enlightened (it doesn’t help that two different characters make the same Terminator joke in two separate scenes, assuring us that Mazer had little control over this script).

It makes little sense what’s deemed “permissible” or philosophically “good” in the world of Dirty Grandpa. So it’s impossible to understand or connect with any of the characters, including Dick. A key scene involves Dick taking Jason aside to tell him something disgusting, then he leaves it at that, saying “That’s it.”

Right. That’s this movie. Someone taking you aside and telling you something wildly inappropriate for the sake of shocking you into a laugh. If that’s not your thing, then stay as far away from Dirty Grandpa as possible.

I’m going to give Dirty Grandpa a D. 

To be fair, it would take a lot of terrible movies to ruin De Niro’s legacy, but it’s hard for me to accept that for scores of new audiences, this could be their first time seeing the actor on the big screen. And that’s such a shame.

 

I’m Jon and thanks for reading this. You can subscribe to my posts by clicking “Follow” in the right sidebar. Or just say hey on Twitter! @JonNegroni

Snarcasm: I Hate The New ‘Suicide Squad’ Movie Because It Exists

suicide squad trailer

A new Suicide Squad trailer dropped this week, and pretty much everyone is in love with it. Everyone, that is, except for a few holdouts who are still complaining about Jared Leto for some reason.

I love Jay from IndieRevolver. For those of you who don’t know, he runs the site and posts frequently as himself.

He has a lot of personality, which makes his writing fun to read. And since his latest piece about Suicide Squad trailer called out fans to defend it, I decided to give him the Snarcasm treatment. Because as you all know, I only do that to people I either dislike tremendously or respect tremendously.

Sorry, Jay. You had to know this was coming. Just maybe not from me…

Headline!

The New Suicide Squad Trailer is Here! …Cool?

 

Well, yeah.

Even if you don’t like the way the movie looks so far, I think it’s easy to find it cool that an actual Suicide Squad featuring lesser-known DC Comics favorites is coming to theaters in August.

But if that’s not good enough…Sweet!

Wayne’s World used the song better…

I don’t get this complaint. Both movies used it in their trailer, so they used the song the same way. Or is Jay just trying to make the argument that he likes a movie that’s been out for 23 years more than one he hasn’t seen yet? Either way, I think Wayne’s World is a weird rubric to judge our comic book movies by.

Maybe instead we should compare the music of Batman and Robin to this trailer, except everyone secretly hums Kiss From a Rose every time the light hits the gloom on the gray, so Jay’s point is actually strengthened.

Seriously, what the hell is this movie?

A movie we can’t peg yet. That means it’s different. Which means it’s exciting.

With each successive piece of this DC puzzle, I feel like we are front row for a slow motion train derailment.

From two trailers and a handful of marketing posters? I’m glad you don’t drive trains in real life, or you’d really start to freak out over nothing.

I like David Ayer and the cast he’s assembled, but nothing about this looks good at all.

“I like everything about it except for the part where things happen.”

OK, that’s unfair, but my point is that we’ve still seen very little of what the movie actually is, which Jay already pointed out above. How can you not get any value out of anything that’s being shown so far?

What would it take to please you, Jay? (Sofia Vergara voice) JAY?!

The Joker looks like a Hot Topic ad from 2000 had a baby with a Joel Schumacher directed Batman film. 

Yeah! The Joker should look, um, normal instead.

Also, I’m pretty sure I’ve never met anyone who likes Hot Topic AND is hardcore enough to have tattoos. Green hair, maybe.

I can’t think of anything I want to see less than this Joker sharing the screen with the autotuned voice of Ben Affleck.

First off, even Cinemablend agrees with me that Batfleck’s voice is downright sexy. Also, how dare you?

There are at least billions of things I want to see less than Jared Leto and Ben Affleck sharing screen time in a comic book movie. Like Ben Affleck and Christian O’Donnell sharing a screen together at all, for example.

Margot Robbie’s Harley Quinn looks like the ONLY reason to watch this film.

This cracks me up. Mostly because the majority of the trailer is centered around Harley Quinn’s humor and insanity. Sure, other characters pop up, but she’s clearly the driving force. So, shouldn’t you love this trailer more?

Theoretically the DC films should be for me. Growing up I leaned toward the DC heroes more than Marvel, but these films all look terrible,

I think the problem (and I don’t say this lightly) is you, Jay. Because everything about this trailer screams the DNA of DC.

For one thing, it’s full of camp. And don’t tell me as a DC fan that Batman comics aren’t incredibly exaggerated on purpose. Also, you’re complaining about a trailer where a machine gun from a helicopter fires in sync with Bohemian Rhapsody. And it’s not good enough for you? JAY?!

We can argue about whether or not this new Joker walks the line between madness and camp. That’s a fair argument, and we haven’t seen enough to feel OK about it. But don’t tell me a movie where Harley Quinn rattles on about the voices in her head after we just watched Beard Smith fire rounds from his arms on top of a police car “doesn’t look good at all.”

which is sad because I want to love them so much.

Clearly.

But they lose me more as each new piece is revealed.

I think he’s also referencing the Dawn of Justice trailer, which I can agree seems a bit worrisome. Too much is revealed and Lex Luthor looks hit or miss. But come on, Jay, don’t tell me you didn’t hear the Justice League theme song when the Trinity walked in slow motion toward Doomsday. Don’t lie to me, Jay.

Who is actually excited for these DC films?

Pretty much everyone except for you and Donna Dickens. And bless her, but Dickens’ only real criticism is something we can’t even judge until the movie comes out.

Someone please explain it. Bring me back.

I guess it’s up to me.

clears throat

Jay. I want to talk to you about two little movies called Guardians of the Galaxy and Ant-Man. Now, I know these were made by a different studio, but let’s be honest. DC is clearly studying these guys like a test that’s in 15 minutes.

When the first trailer for Guardians of the Galaxy came out, people were in two camps:

“Oh, this looks interesting. I’ll probably see it.”

“What? This is weird and has never really been done before. So it’ll be a disaster.”

Now, when every trailer for Ant-Man came out, people were in two camps:

“Oh, this looks interesting. I’ll probably see it.”

“What? This is weird and has never really been done before. So it’ll be a disaster.”

What about Fantastic Four? What did people say about that movie?

“Human Torch is black?”

“Give the rights back to Marvel.”

So fret not, Jay. Because even if Suicide Squad isn’t some sort of reincarnation of The Dark Knight, or worse, even if Dawn of Justice is somewhat disappointing, neither movie will be as bad as Fantastic Four.

Oh, and they’ll be (like I said earlier) different.

Not original, obviously, but different. And different is interesting. Maybe it’s a little unsettling. Maybe it’s not necessarily good. But it’ll probably be worth your time.

Besides, we all know you’re going to watch it.

 

Hey! If you’ve come across a silly article that deserves the Snarcasm treatment, send it my way via Twitter or the comments below!

I’m Jon and thanks for reading this. You can subscribe to my posts by clicking “Follow” in the right sidebar. Or just say hey on Twitter! @JonNegroni