honest interview

No More Questions: Melissa McCarthy from ‘The Boss’

melissa mccarthy questions

Welcome to No More Questions, where I ask the stars you know and love everything you want to know and love.

When I say I’ve been waiting all my life to sit down with Melissa McCarthy from this weekend’s wide release, The Boss, I really mean to say that I’ve been waiting since I reread the film slate to make sure there wasn’t anyone else on the list.

Two screened phone calls from Jake Gyllenhaal later, I managed to get some face time with the face of McCarthyism, which her publicist keeps emailing me not to say for some reason. Thanks to my spam folder, however, we have a No More Questions made for the fans.

Go on…No More Questions: Melissa McCarthy from ‘The Boss’

No More Questions: Shailene Woodley from ‘The Divergent Series: Allegiant’

shailene woodley interview

Welcome to No More Questions, where I ask the stars you know and love everything you want to know and love.

I think we can all agree that an interview with Miles Teller would’ve been unpleasant and boring, so I disguised myself as Molly Ringwald’s agent and stood next to a Starbucks community board in Beverly Hills until Shailene Woodley just had to talk to me.

We sat down and discussed her new movie The Divergent Series: Allegiant based on the novel “Hunger Games” by Sapphire, as well as some other things you actually care about.

Note: No More Questions is satire. It does not reflect the actual views of Shailene Woodley, Jon Negroni, or anyone else mentioned in this interview. Some of the content in this interview comes from actual quotes by Shailene Woodley in other interviews. Seriously. 

JN: I have to admit something Shia LaWoodley. 

SW: …?

JN: I’ve never done a No More Questions interview with someone younger than me. I hope I don’t break the law here…

SW: We’re both adults, so there’s nothing to worry about.

JN: Hey, whoa, Shia. Are you hitting on me? Because—

SW: No.

JN: A lot of people don’t like you, but they have a hard time articulating why they don’t like you. Do you know why?

SW: Do I know why people can’t explain why they don’t like me? That’s what you’re asking?

JN: Apparently, both of us are.

SW: I suppose it’s my…

JN: …voice

SW: …acting prowess…

JN: (laughs) 

SW: …are we going to talk about the movie at some point?

JN: So Shaileancuisine, how has being the star of a young adult book franchise that most people hate changed your life? 

SW: I don’t feel like my life has changed at all.

JN: Not at all? Because your haircut begs to differ.

SW: I’ve changed a lot because I’ve grown in the last four years. But my values, my morals, what I stand for, hasn’t changed because of this movie. I feel blessed because I have more opportunities artistically.

JN: Are you saying Divergent is…art?

SW: (laughs) No, of course not. I just have the name recognition to do better work now.

JN: Now you can make those dollas! 

(we high five, but Shailene is clearly more into it than I am)

JN: It’s clear that no one takes Divergent seriously at this point. So why do you think celebrated actors like Naomi Watts, Octavia Spencer, Kate Winslet, and even Jeff Daniels keep showing up in these things?

SW: I have a few theories on this because it baffles me, too. Like first day on set, I said to Kate Winslet, “Why are you even here? It’s not like you started out as an extra on Degrassi.”

But then I looked over and saw Jai Courtney by craft services, and Miles Teller and I sort of looked at each other and in unison went, “Ohhhhhhhh.”

JN: But Jailene Woodley—er—Jai Courtney isn’t in this next movie…

SW: You’re welcome.

JN: Let’s just be honest Shirelene, you’re quite attractive. But not obviously attractive. Would you say that this has hurt or helped your career, disregarding The Spectacular Now?

SW: I’m glad you brought that up, because ever since The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I’ve had trouble looking at myself in the mirror. But for whatever reason, my boyfriends from other movies keep showing up in the same movie with me.

JN: You don’t seem weirded out by it. You…seem to like it.

SW: Wouldn’t you?

JN: (I look down at my shoes for some reason) What would you say is your worst movie? 

SW: I get this question a lot, but the answer always changes. Recently, I said Fault in Our Stars because I was having a conversation with Willem Dafoe and needed him to stop crashing on my couch. Before that, I told everyone The Descendents so Willem Dafoe would get jealous.

JN: Yes, I’ve read on Reddit that it’s a great couch. What was your first thought of me? 

SW: Like, as a person?

JN: Little bit of this, little bit of that.

SW: Well, the eyeliner wasn’t necessary. I’ve never seen Molly’s agent wear it.

JN: I wanted you to think I was unpredictable.

SW: I don’t.

JN: What gives you the right to judge me? 

SW: I make more money than you, for one thing.

JN: True, but I’ve been on fewer garbage TV shows.

MT: BURN!

JN: What? Is that Miles Teller I see?

(Miles Teller walks in)

MT: Hey guys, what’s relevant?

JN: Shaimean-to-Jon was just talking about how her career has been mostly terrible.

MT: True, true.

SW: Miles…

MT: I know, I know. I’ll be off your couch soon. J.K. and I—

SW: He’s not going to let you use his shower again. It’s been two years.

MT: I GOT HIM AN OSCAR.

JN: I’m sensing a lot of tension here, guys. Sparks between your characters in Allegiant? Might as well go full Hunger Games at this point. 

SW: No love triangles, or I walk. That’s in the contract.

(Miles shakes his head at this obvious bluff).

JN: Speaking of better franchises, a lot of people — mostly me — like to compare movies to famous soda brands. Between Divergent and Hunger Games, which of you is Coke and which is Diet Coke?

MT: (barely holding in laughter) Is Pepsi OK?

(Miles and I start laughing uncontrollably)

SW: Well, Hunger Games should be Diet Coke right? Because they’re already hungry?

(Miles and I stop laughing and just stare at her)

JN: Have you…seen Hunger Games?

SW: OK, um. You guys should know. I’ve never watched a movie before. Not even a TV show.

(Miles and I look at each other)

In Unison: Ohhhhhhhhhh. /MT: that explains it.

The Divergent Series: Allegiant opens worldwide on March 18, 2016.

I’m Jon and thanks for reading this. You can subscribe to my posts by clicking “Follow” in the right sidebar. Or just say hey on Twitter! @JonNegroni

 

No More Questions: Ginnifer Goodwin from ‘Zootopia’

ginnifer goodwin zootopia interview

Welcome to No More Questions, where I ask the stars you know and love everything you want to know and love.

This week, Ginnifer Goodwin was kind enough to forget to fire her publicist for letting me get her personal phone number in order to mass text her enough times to land this interview.

Lending her vocal talents to the upcoming Disney animated movie, Zootopia, Ginnifer spills the beans on bunnies, rabbits, hares, and the differences between them that shape our existential moralities.

Just kidding! We talk about Josh Dallas a lot.

*Note: No More Questions is satire. It does not reflect the actual views of Ginnifer Goodwin, Jon Negroni, or anyone else mentioned in this interview. Some of the content in this interview comes from actual quotes by Ginnifer in other interviews. Seriously. 

JN: Hi Ginevra. How do you react when people confuse you with Bonnie Wright, the actress who played Ginny Weasly in the Harry Potter films? 

GG: Well, I don’t go by Ginny, so that’s an odd question. And her name is Ginevra, but mine’s Ginnifer (laughs, sort of). What’s going on right now?

JN: I can’t speak for readers at home, but we’re all sort of wondering why you changed your name from “Jennifer.” 

GG: (squints) It’s not a secret. I changed it to match the dialect of “Ginnifer.” Anyway, I’d love to talk about my character in Zootopia—

JN: (SINGS) this is utooooopia, let’s make a brand new start.

GG: Is…is that the theme song from that reality show, Utopia?

JN: You play a bunny police officer with hundreds of brothers and sisters. Yet you’re the center of your parents’ attention to the point where they leave them unattended during the entirety of your school play. Do you feel guilty for this level of narcissism?

GG: Who, me? Or the character?

JN: Let’s say both. 

GG: Judy’s parents love all their children equally, first of all. And it’s funny you bring up Judy being the main character, because not many people realize that originally, Nick the fox was the protagonist while I played more of a sidekick.

JN: Until you pushed him aside so you could wax your ego.

GG: No! Disney realized that this version of the movie was too bleak, so they repurposed the story.

JN: OK, but what did you do to Jason Bateman that nearly got him fired from the gig?

GG: I really shouldn’t say.

JN: You can just whisper it to me, and I won’t put it in.

GG: (thinks for a second) No…no, let’s not do that.

JN: How do you respond to the people who think Zootopia is the worst movie of all time?

GG: Well, I haven’t heard anyone say that. What’s great about the movie is how it has so many themes. And some of these themes contradict each other in amazing ways.

JN: Sort of how you’ve been contradicting yourself during this entire interview. 

GG: Just like that! (Laughs and tries to get me to laugh as well, but I don’t) And I can’t wait for a sequel.

JN: Sure, lots of people are engaging in sequel talk, only for a different Ginnifer Goodwin movie. 

GG: What?

JN: Sure, yeah. The He’s Just Not That Into You follow up where you’re the one the dude just isn’t that into. Well, I guess that means it’s about the same as the last one. 

GG: (glances at publicist) You didn’t tell him to avoid a bringing that up?!

(Indiscernible dialogue)

GG: You’re fired again.

JN: Do you think people like you more now that you have blonde hair? 

GG: (Eyes bulge and roll around) I think Judy is like a half-glass-full kind of bunny. Sort of like me.

JN: But the dye you used wasn’t half-full, for sure. 

GG: It’s all about teamwork. Judy learns this lesson throughout Zootopia.

JN: You’re ignoring me more than your daughter in Once Upon a Time. 

GG: Look, it’s not my fault that the evil queen forced Emma away from me and—

JN: Ginny…

GG: What.

JN: You’re ginsplaining again.

GG: What.

JN: It’s how we refer to your personality on social media platforms. When you start going off on fictional tangents, we say you’re ginsplaining. It used to be called jensplaining, but…

GG: Anyway, Zootopia is great because it’s as much of an adventure film as it is a comedy, and at the same time I cried when I read the script.

JN: So Zootopia has no focus? Why would you say something negative about the movie you’re promoting?

GG: I’m not—

JN: Ginsplaining?

GG: (silence)

JN: Why don’t we see any reptiles or birds in Zootopia, a movie about diversity?

GG: Well, maybe in a future film—

JN: You’ll kick the can down the road Oscars-style, huh? 

GG: There’s a lot of opportunity in how—

JN: And what about bugs?

GG: I don’t—

JN: What will these animals eat if they can’t eat each other? Or bugs?

GG: I think A Bug’s Life paints a good picture of how—

JN: What’s it like dating a co-star on set?

GG: Oh, thank goodness, a real question. Josh and I fell in love in 2011.

JN: Before you changed your name…

GG: No, I was Ginnifer at this point.

JN: Does Josh know…

GG: Well, it’s not that important.

JN: How would you feel if you found out he was Josh Peck this entire time?

GG: I’d be horrified.

JN: Look, as an extra on Full House, I know something about dating your co-star. 

GG: You dated one of the Olsen twins?

JN: Well, not one of them. Who’s conducting this interview?

GG: This isn’t an interview.

JN: That’s the most honest thing you’ve said all day. Well, that’s all the time we have with Jennifer Goodwin. Thank you so much for being on the show, and don’t forget to watch Zootopia at some point! 

GG: Who are you talking to?

 

Zootopia opens worldwide on March 4, 2016.

I’m Jon and thanks for reading this. You can subscribe to my posts by clicking “Follow” in the right sidebar. Or just say hey on Twitter! @JonNegroni