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No More Questions: Ben Affleck from ‘Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice’

no more questions ben affleck

Welcome to No More Questions, where I ask the stars you know and love everything you want to know and love.

Tracking down Ben Affleck was the easy part. Getting him to sit still for at least 30 seconds was a challenge, for reasons that pertain to some subject matter I purposefully avoided mentioning. OK, his divorce.

Being unfaithful to Jennifer Garner aside, Affleck was gracious enough to believe that I really am a professional reporter for Jetset Online Network (or JON for short), and we had a remarkable conversation about life, family, fortune, and other topics that overtly sidestep his involvement in Daredevil.

Note: No More Questions is satire. It does not reflect the actual views of Ben Affleck, Jon Negroni, or anyone else mentioned in this interview. Some of the content in this interview comes from actual quotes by Ben Affleck in other interviews. Seriously. 

JN: What would you say is your biggest missed opportunity? Aside from not being the official sponsor of Aflac. 

BA: (shoots me a puzzled look) You know, it’s crazy what kind of stuff I’ve turned down. Some of it good, some of it bad.

JN: The Internet thinks most of it is bad. And that you’re bad as a person. Can you speak to that?

BA: Haters gonna hate, I guess. Maybe those Internets you mentioned should go to Blockbuster and rent Argo (laughs unironically).

JN: Ben…

BA: Yeah?

JN: You…you know what the Internet is, right? And that Blockbuster has been out of business for years because of…the Internet…

BA: What? Oh, yeah. Sure. The Internet is such an important thing, you know (looks around the room, dazed).

JN: So then, you’ve never seen this (hands Ben a picture of him and Matt Damon as Batman and Robin).

BA: Where did you get this.

JN: The Internet, Ben. It’s been making fun of you for years. Here’s a GIF of you two running (shows Ben the GIF).

BA: What’s a gaffe? What?

JN: You have a history of dating your costars, Benjamin. After shooting Batman v Superman, would you say you’re closer to a relationship with Henry Cavill or Jesse Eisenberg?

BA: Amy Adams, for sure. Actually, forget I said that. This isn’t on record, right?

JN: Is this because you and Henry look so alike? 

BA: (thinks intensely) Actually, that’s not so bad. It’s like looking into an even more attractive mirror.

JN: So you have no problem with the main characters of this big budget superhero movie being two white guys with dark hair? 

BA: You never asked that.

JN: Don’t avoid the question like it’s a call from Aflac.

BA: (leans in) Don’t tell me what to do. My lawyers got me a story credit on Good Will Hunting, pal.

JN: Most people hate the idea of you playing Batman. Do you think this is personal, or because they just hate you?

BA: With Batman, you have to be identifiable. For me, hooking into this character had more to do with…he’s a human being. He’s an easier entree.

JN: So people will eat him up? 

BA: Yeah, not like Green Inferno eating up, but like maybe Hostel?

JN: I didn’t want to bring this up, but now I’m hungry. Do you blame yourself for Daredevil

BA: Daredevil didn’t work at all, man. It was made before people figured out that you could make these movies and make them well.

JN: How would you make Daredevil now?

BA: Easy. I’d cast Charlie Cox and deliver the whole thing on like maybe a service that sends you DVDs in the mail. Have it tie in to the Marvel Cinematic Universe. All that jazz.

JN: That’s already a thing on Netflix, Ben. 

BA: Net what?

JN: Who are you rooting for in this fight? Batman or Superman?

BA: Uh, that’s a stupid question for a lot of reasons.

JN: I know. Just wanted to make sure you were still paying attention. Alright (clears throat), how positive are you that this new Batman is even close to transcending the performance of George Clooney?

BA: I’m not sure who that is, but let me just say that there is something about Batman as both a superhero and a normal man with vulnerabilities and weaknesses like we all have that makes his appeal kind of enduring, because he is not just super, he is also like us.

JN: We’re all rich orphans?

BA: Exactly, exactly.

JN: Ben, we have a surprise guest waiting just outside the door thanks to my clever idea to leave a sandwich right by the doorknob. He should be finished by now, so come on in, Henry Cavill!

HC: (walks in with his mouth stuffed) heyff effreyonff.

BA: I thought this was just you and me?

JN: Easy, Ben. Leave the duking it out for the major motion picture (laughs slightly). Henry, tell me something personal about Ben he made you promise not to tell anyone.

HC: (nods casually) No problem. His favorite episode of Hart of Dixie is actually—

(Ben and I gasp)

JN: You have an accent? 

BA: Since when?

HC: Since when? Ben, we shot the film together for months. You held my baby girl in your arms.

BA: Uh, you don’t have any kids, Henry. You’re not even engaged anymore.

HC: She’ll come around.

JN: Guys, we can talk about our personal lives once The View finally buys me out. For now, let’s talk about the movie. What was that episode of Hart of Dixie?

BA: (points to Henry) NO! Don’t do it, pal.

HC: (chuckles) Why, would it tear you apart? Like your nanny?

(Ben and I in unison): Whoaaaa, hey whoaaaa /JN: Not cool, man.

HC: We’re like brothers! Everyone on set called us Hen Affleck and Benry Cavill.

BA: That never happened once.

JN: Did…did your “fiancé” call you that, Henry?

HC: What? Oh, well…

BA: Is she in the room right now, H-Bomb?

(Henry starts sobbing in Ben’s arms)

JN: Well, that’s all the time we have today for No More Questions. Guys, thanks for getting to the real talk and letting people know why they should watch Batman v Superman.

BA: Anytime. I’m being serious, actually.

HC: (choking through the tears) I really like the name of your magazine.


Batman v Superman opens worldwide on March 25, 2016.

I’m Jon and thanks for reading this. You can subscribe to my posts by clicking “Follow” in the right sidebar. Or just say hey on Twitter! @JonNegroni

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Forget a Sequel, ‘Hancock’ Should Just Be a TV Series

Remember that Will Smith movie from 2008 about a homeless superhero who’s bad at being a superhero?

Well, Hancock is likely getting its long-awaited sequel soon, despite how “meh” the original was after the first hour. In fact, I speculated on what I would love to see from a Hancock follow up two years ago, and young Jon Negroni simply argued that the hero, Hancock, deserves his own superhero team. And you know what? I stand by how fun that sounds.

HANCOCK

Except now I believe the Hancock story should be reimagined as a series, perhaps with a new cast. You can blame the success of streaming hits like Daredevil and House of Cards for getting me on the Netflix content bandwagon.

The interesting thing about Hancock is that it isn’t a superhero adaptation. It’s actually based on a story dreamed up by Vincent Ngo, a writer/producer who came up with the character of Hancock back in the mid-1990s.

Of course, stalls in development kept the film in limbo for over a decade, but this world of fallen angels being reluctant superheroes is still ripe for exploitation. And thanks to Hancock‘s somewhat bittersweet ending, a reboot/refresh sounds very appealing to fans like me.

HANCOCK

See, the movie itself was pretty fun up until the third act, when it rushed its “serious” plot with a weird twist and underpowered finale. But imagine how much more entertaining the origin of Hancock would be if it was given a full season of episodes to build up its lore with the same comedic timing and exciting action sequences.

If I was in the writer’s room, I’d prefer Ngo’s original take on the story, where Hancock has a stronger relationship with Aaron, the young son of Ray and Mary. It’s a more interesting dynamic that doesn’t need the weird sexual tension built between Hancock and Mary to drive the plot. Instead, you have a broken, lonely man with powers slowly becoming a hero alongside a kid who adores him. Now that sounds like a TV show premise worth pitching.

When you rewatch Hancock, you’ll notice that his motivations for going along with Ray’s “PR rebranding” are pretty weak when you think about it too much. Hancock suddenly decides he wants people to like him, seemingly out of nowhere. But it makes way more sense if Hancock builds a realistic friendship with Aaron, which eventually leads him to discovering the truth behind his powers.

HANCOCK

In other words: more Hancock and Aaron. Less weird love triangle stuff. Oh, and more action.

Now imagine all of that stretched out over 13 episodes of a grisly weirdo learning how to be super. And then contrast this concept with the over saturation of comic book movies and TV shows about people who fight crime because it’s the right thing to do.

You know, while Hancock just does it because shrug whatever.

I love the idea of a Hancock series, especially with a new cast and refreshed plot that can deviate from what we saw in the movie by actually including real villains (not just a bunch of bank robbers).

As for casting…well, you can decide that for yourselves in the comments.

 

Thanks for reading! If you like this blog, you can subscribe for weekly updates by clicking the “Subscribe” button on the right sidebar. Or just follow me on Twitter for the latest updates – @JonNegroni

 

Daredevil Review, Movies That Actually Deserve Remakes

daredevil review

Get ready for an action-packed episode of Now Conspiring. Maria, Adonis and I chat in length about the new Marvel/Netflix series, Daredevil, along with early impressions for Avengers: Age of Ultron (don’t worry, no spoilers). We covered a ton of info this week to keep you up to date with all things movie/television.

Late in the show, we had a fun thought experiment: which movies deserve to have remakes? If you don’t agree with our pick, be sure to sound your opinions in the comments!

Enjoy the show, and please rate and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes if you like us!

Question of the Week: Which movie or movie franchise do you think most deserves a remake/reboot?

Song of the Week: We actually featured an album this week. Mat Kearney’s “Just Kids” came out, and the featured song we start the show with is “One Heart.”

Other music you heard in this episode:

“The Avengers” — Alan Silvestri

“Heartbreak Dreamer” — Mat Kearney

“Teen Titans Theme” — Puffy Ami Yumi & Puffy AmiYumi

“Billion” — Mat Kearney

“Moving On” — Mat Kearney

“The Conversation” — Mat Kearney

“Los Angeles” — Mat Kearney

Early Reviews For ‘Daredevil’ Are In, And They’re Great

daredevil review

From The Verge:

Daredevil is the best (and bloodiest) show Marvel has made yet.

With so many new superhero shows on television, Daredevil successfully raises the bar. As Marvel’s crop of TV projects have evolved from decent (Agents of SHIELD) to excellent (Agent Carter), Daredevil pushes the envelope by going down dark paths the Marvel Cinematic Universe hasn’t gone down before.

This review confirms that Daredevil takes place in a New York City torn apart (metaphorically) by the damage we saw in The Avengers, three years ago. I wasn’t expecting such a direct tie-in, but man if I can’t wait any longer to check this show out. 

The premise is what hooks me the most. A world where the Avengers have failed New York, and your only hero is a blind vigilante. Just perfect.

Deadline also reviewed the show, saying “Marvel’s Daredevil is the TV offering from the superhero giant that we’ve been waiting for.” The Washington Post aptly named it a “creative bullseye” for Marvel.

If you have a Netflix account, you can start streaming the series in its entirety on Friday.

What Can The Wachowskis Do Next?

wachowskis next

(Click here to download the episode)

This week on the Now Conspiring Podcast, we review Jupiter Ascending and share our thoughts on the future of the Wachowski’s style of filmmaking. From The Matrix and V for Vendetta to Speed Racer and Cloud Atlas, we talk about what we hope they do next.

We also review The SpongeBob MovieSponge out of WaterSeventh Son, and The Voices (starring Ryan Reynolds and Anna Kendrick).

Later in the show, we discuss the casting news around the live-action Teen Titans show, the new Daredevil trailer, and more. Plus, we share our Netflix Recommendation of the Week in case you’re in a rut. And as always, stick around for our preview of this weekend’s new movie releases.

Enjoy the show, and don’t forget to rate and subscribe to our show on iTunes if you have a few seconds!

 

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