Snark + Snarcasm = what you’re about to read
I struggled selecting this week’s Snarcasm because at this point, I’m pretty much done talking about Batman v Superman. I’ve reviewed it, talked about it endlessly on the podcast, and I even wrote a list of over 65 problems I have with it.
I’m just done. And while typical Snarcasm fare would involve digesting (then regurgitating) an insanely contrarian piece about Jesse Eisenberg’s “Lex Luthor” being the best version of the character yet…which exists…this week, let’s take a look at something you’ve probably thought at least 300 times in your lifetime.
Film critics aren’t perfect.
For some reason, people think that critics think that they are perfect. That they fancy themselves the end all for whether or not a movie is truly good or bad. Never mind the fact that critics disagree constantly, which is why websites like Rotten Tomatoes and Metacritic exist. But this is the Internet, where all of your presuppositions and knee-jerk opinions are signed into law by Facebook Congress (I’m bad at metaphors).
Sidney Fussell at Tech Insider (because apparently the film blogs didn’t want this hot take) writes:
Here’s the problem with all those bad ‘Batman v Superman’ reviews
Weirdly, but not surprisingly, Sid gives us more than just one “problem” with these reviews. I’ll be honest though and let you know now that I have quite a few problems with this article.
“Batman v Superman” isn’t a perfect film.
When did “this movie is not perfect” become the new preface for setting up an unpopular opinion? Next you’re going to tell us that Superman has a black best friend.

But it would have to be a lot worse to justify its embarrassing dogpiling from critics.
Would it, though? I’m one of the critics who hated it, but it’s not like BvS has a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes (as in 0% of critics liked it). It actually scored a 29%, with most critics being pretty mixed on the movie. In fact, the article Sid links to here mentions that critics almost unanimously praised certain aspects of this film, including Ben Affleck’s take on Batman.
So where is the dogpiling? The film has an average rating on RT of 5/10, which is an even split. You know, the opposite of an uneven split.
Holy generalizations, Batman!
First of all, critics have been frustrated with the superhero genre getting oversaturated for a while, now. Age of Ultron had a lot of complaints lobbed at it for this, and weak entries like Fantastic 4 have been eviscerated by critics. What makes BvS so special that it gets a pass for happening to be a bad movie that also exists in an oversaturated genre?
The film had to set up the DC universe, debut new characters, break even on the budget, and keep up with Marvel. Each misstep (and there are many) was reported as a complete disaster.
Which is exactly the fault of DC for putting all of their hopes and dreams (and ideas) into one movie, when they could have just as easily taken their time and evened out their ambition. The stakes are high because DC is playing a high-stakes game and betting the house on the ponies and other casino metaphors (told you).
The pressure to do it all made for a very uneven film and many critics voiced frustration at what they saw was a rush to set up a lucrative cinematic universe (with endless spin-off and sequel potential) over simply making a good film.
In other words, “Critics made that criticism because they’re right! What a bunch of morons!”
It’s funny though. The second season of Daredevil stuffs a lot of new characters and plots into its run, and yet critics aren’t taking their frustrations out on Marvel/Netflix. I wish I knew why.

When reading the many poor reviews of “Batman v Superman” it becomes apparent that somewhere along the way the action epic morphed from just one subpar action film into the representation of everything wrong with the (admittedly stuffed) superhero genre.
Again, this is because the movie itself is poor. If it had been excellent, no one would have made this observation. You sound like Zuko complaining because he didn’t want to go to the war meeting (“I just wanted to be invited!”)
Amy Adams, who stars as Lois Lane, said the movie simply wasn’t “for the critics.”
Sure, let’s listen to the person who has a financial stake in the film she’s promoting. Not saying that doesn’t mean she’s right, but—
She’s right.
Let’s just settle down.
Hey! If you’ve come across a silly article that deserves the Snarcasm treatment, send it my way via Twitter or the comments below!
I’m Jon and thanks for reading this. You can subscribe to my posts by clicking “Follow” in the right sidebar. Or just say hey on Twitter! @JonNegroni
This Snarcasm was weak this time. Sorry. Luckily, I have an idea for a fantastic Snarcasm! It is an article on how Batman v Superman is too smart for Marvel Fans. Link is here
http://nypost.com/2016/03/30/batman-v-superman-is-too-smart-for-marvel-fans/
See, I’m actually glad Jon didn’t do a Snarcasm like that this week. The problems list he posted on Tuesday basically covers everything wrong with Batman v Superman.
Don’t listen to him, Jon. This week’s Snarcasm was pretty solid, and I laughed quite a bit at the Supergirl joke 🙂
I also got the Supergirl joke. Thing is Arrow already made friends with a black person before Supergirl did.
Let’s say you love McDonalds…
Not my favorite Snarcasm, but you definitely got the right idea.
I love Snarcasm so much.
This movie touched me.